Your cloudless blue sky.

Right now the sky here is clear blue and absolutely cloudless. When I look at the sky I try to detremine its mood. When its cloudy I infer the mood is jubiliant. (This is Sindh). When there is thunderstorm the sky is enraged. When there is duststorm sky is irritated and when there is no air and every thing is still the sky is gloomy. (This rarley happens here as Hyderabad's nights are famous for cool air and its days are almost always windy).
What does cloudless clear blue sky represent? It represents the real character of sky......calm, thoughtful, profound, sober, patient and aloof. No matter what seasons come and go, eventually sky remains what it is. Beyond the thick layers of clouds or sheet of dust sky is blue and ofcourse cloudless. We experience this when we fly above, all is blue.
I am using all this as a metaphor to bring a point into notice. Everyone should know and remain in touch with his or her real character, real self. No matter what is the mood it will pass. No matter how we feel at that time that emotion will be over. Inside you there is a clear blue sky that is unaffected by the swings of moods. That clear blue sky is real you. The depression or bad moods you experience are like sandstorm or clouds over the sky. As the sky remains unaffected no matter what goes beneth it same is the case with your real self it will be not affected by temporary swings of moods. Know and keep in touch with the cloudless blue sky inside you. (This post is inspired by Deepak Chopra's book Uncoditional Life)

Nakata and Zorba

Last week I finsihed reading the novel "Kafka on the Shore" by Haruki Murakami and what an absorbing experience that was. Nakata, one of the characters of the novel, reminded me of Zorba, a character of Kazantzakis' novel "Zorba the Greek". Despite having entirely different upbringing and background both share an uncanny similarity in character. What is that similarity? I call it their natural way of living. By natural way of living I mean absorbing oneself to nature to become part of nature and feel at ease with nature. Plants, air, rain, sunshine are all natural phenomenon so are the human beings. Both Nakata and Zorba acted naturally. Having no burden of the past, living in the present, giving fully to the task at hand, having a sound sleep when tired, replenishing the energies with food and enjoying every single bit of it when hungry are their natural ways of living.What was the result of living such a life......they were happy. Living a life naturally seems easy but only few actually live life naturally.

Hawaiian Queen' s Message to Americans

The islands of Hawaii in the mid of Pacific Ocean are now 50th state of the US. Since childhood I was fascinated by these remote Islands of Pacific Ocean. The mainland USA is 2300 miles away in the east. Hawaii was an independent state till 1890. In 1893 Queen Lili'uokalani was dethroned by Americans. She sent the following message to the American people. The message contains pain and a sense of betrayal. I post the message so that we remember the sad story of the annexation of Hawaii by US whenever we see fun filled pictures of Hawaii.

" Do not covet the little vineyards of Naboth so far from your shores, lest the punishment of Ahab fall upon you, if not in your day, in that of your children, for ' be not decieved, God is not mocked.' The people to whom your fathers told of the living God, and taught them to call 'Father,' and whom the sons now seek to despoil and destroy, are crying to Him in their time of trouble; and He will keep his promise, and will listen to the voices of His Hawaiian children lamenting for their homes."

Such a pain, such a grief.

Idealism vs Realism

She and I were sitting on the bench in the evening in the campus garden. She was wearing light green lawn suit. Yes summer has arrived here. The gentle breeze of river Indus touching her hair. She looked so fresh. I was seated beside her on the bench. Few of her books were placed between us. After greeting one another through eyes she spoke.
She: Now you tell me why are you so much against being idealist?
I: It’s because Idealist ignores reality and search for something that does not exist. I am against idealism because it forgets to see the beauty in reality.
She: Beauty? Where is the beauty? It’s an ugly world…so much of hatred, killings, war …all the misfortunes…. it is the idealism that leads us towards correcting all the wrongs.
I: Idealists try to find something that does not exist, something that cannot exist…idealists dream for a world that is impossible to built because by default we human beings have been fighting each other since the start of history and we will continue to do so ever. For me the ideal world is the existing world…the present is ideal because out of infinite possibilities this present has emerged. The world could have been anything…but no …the actions of nature and billion of other factors have contributed to the emergence of this present world.powerful forces have shaped it.this is ideal,,,see you are ideal…because nature has selected you to come into existence....the selection of nature is ideal..now you may want your height different or you may not be satisfied with any of your feature but for me whatever exists is ideal….is perfect.The color of your eyes is the color no one has…to have exactly the same color …no not possible
She: now does it mean nothing needs to be improved…..we just let ourselves resigned to what ever comes our way in the life……no ..I want to build my own world…make this world better. and I damn care if I possess the unique color of eyes or not. …it doesn’t matter to me ..what matters is what have I contributed to making this world a better place…..a place where every person has the opportunity to reach self actulization..to be in the ideal state of his or her being……….I cannot agree to your viewpoint.
I: we are constantly in a flux..everything is changing..the thoughts flowing in your mind are having an impact on all the surroundings…..right here..in the city beside river Indus……our talk will have an impact on tomorrow, something will be changed….may be for better ….but still there will be idealists always running for better………exhausting themselves in the persuit of perfection...and missing the momemts that are no less ideal…..like this evening……under the clear blue sky..amidst…roses…., take a deep breath and you will inhale all the freshness…..as I am doing……….and the air I breath comes after touching roses, river and you..and makes my soul dance..this is ideal for me..my eyes are attuned to beauty……
She: hey…..you call me idealist……infact you are idealist……..only looking at what you want to look at……..but that’s a very unrealistic and limited way of looking at things.
I: yeah you may call me an ideal realist.
She: or a real idealist..
I: well I just want to see your pursuing dreams while appreciating what is best around you
She: I know that…………looking at me
I: (smiling) your eyes………really ideal
We laughed and departed. :

It is love, Idiot.

Why do you want her to tell you in inverted comas that she loves you. Why do you want her to bare her emotions? Why do you want her to admit explicitly her falling in love? Is this not enough for you to see that her eyes shine when she sees you? Is this not enough that her voice trembles while speaking to you? Is this not enough that she is happy in your company and sad when she is away? Do you know you are showing that you are not confident that anyone could love you? Girls go indirectly in expressing their love, their admiration and their liking especially at the initial stage of the love. When the drop of rain falls one does not look up to confirm for clouds. It is love, Idiot.

Why are they called Indians?

Why are natives of America called Indians? She asked me. I asked her in return, "You tell me why are they called Indians? What do you think? She replied " I think,may be because they......I dont know that's why I am asking you." I smiled and told her...ok...Now listen..
In 1453 Ottoman Turks captured Constantinople (modern day Istanbul) from the Byzantines. The capture of Constantinople blocked the land rout between Europe and India and Eurpoeans started thinking seriously to find the sea route to India so that they did not have to deal with hostile Turks.
Christopher Columbus was convinced that by sailing towards west the route to India could be found. Convinced by this theory King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain sponsored the voyage of Columbus to discover the sea rout to India. In 1492 Columbus sailed out for India from Spain in the western direction. After a journey of 29 days he found an Island and thought he had discovered India. The people there were called Indians by Columbus and since then the name has been stuck on the indigenous people of Americas.
She was delighted to hear this..why don't you write it down? she asked.
"Fine, I will write a post about it on my blog." I answered.

Life

The experience of living ,just living,need no efforts. When I say no effrots I mean even if we do not put our efforts to live we will continue to live till we encounter death. Live a purposeful life or just drift aimlessly you will end in a naught. In the long run who cares what happened to the lives of billions who are living today. Do we care what happened to billions of unnamed, unrecognized homo sapiens who persihed before us. In the long run everyone's life has no meaning. We are myopic creatures who think ourselves as the centre of the universe. Laughable Predisposition.
Lte's look at the life of an ant. The tiny ant may be thinking that it is making the life of fellow ants better through its efforts. That ant has just been crushed under the foot of a teenage boy while he was runnig just for running. Has anyone noticed........? "The Ant" is gone. We are no more important than these tiny ants in the larger scheme of the universe. Shooooooooooooooooo,and we are finished. The stars keep moving. Not a moment for them to mourn for us, they even dont know about us, how would they care, sum is zero.....result is nothingness. Life is a meaningless experiment of mind of a creature on the tiny ball call earth that is travelling towards emptiness. Life is a joke.....take it lightly!!!!

Two nights.....60 years apart

Last night I felt immense peace and calm as if everything was in harmony. While lying on my bed my thoughts took me away in the past and I imagined the night of September 1947 when my father, at that time 23 year old, was crossing into Pakistan from India at the time of partition in the train that was attacked many a times during its travel from Delhi. At that time what mattererd most was the survival. The passing of each moment safely was an achievement. The covering of each yard of the distance from Pakistan was a feat. It was the night of doubts, anxiety, fear and apprehension. Time passed......a night in 2006....his son now a grown up man, felt peace and calm around him.....and missed his father who passed away couple of years ago....and thought about his struggle and his love at the same time and said to him in simple words " I owe to you this night of peace and calm."

Choice!!

She (through sms)= Thanks 4 luving me.
Me(reply)=It's my choice.

teray janay kay baad.../after your departure

kuchh dair tahar jatay..
yun na chalay jatay..
hum bhi sanbhal jatay..
jo tum ruk jaatay...

yun na dhoop parti
yun na piyas barhti
yun na aansoo bahtay
yun na paaun jaltay

waqt nay sikha diya hai
ab jhooti hansi hansna
jo saibaan nahin hai
khud sar pay haath rakhna

yeh safar-e-zindagi hai
manzar badal raha hai
hum bhi badal gai hain
har shakhs badal raha hai

---------------------

had you stayed more
had you not gone like this
we would have prevailed
If you had stayed..

there would have been no such scorching sun rays
no such increasing thirst
no such flooding of tears
no such burning of feet

now we have learnt
how to pretend to be happy
if there is no shelter
how to cover head with our hands

this is the journey of life
every scene is changing
we have also changed
as every person is changing

The dream journey!!

The moonless sky glittering with stars, I and you crossing the desert in land cruiser, full blown music, you wearing blue jeans and white T shirt, your hair all over your shoulders, your eyes sleepy and I looking into them time to time ...and then we stopping and camping in the open sky....in the morning we will resume our journey towards east. You know I love to see that old fort of Jaisalmer so you accompanying me to my dream journey. O Karachi girl!!! I love you.

My love for Spanish

Hola!!!
In the beginning let me make it very clear that " I don't know Spanish" but this is also true that I want to learn Spanish. Why Spanish? The love for Spanish or to be exact for Spain started during my school days when I read the poetry of Allama Iqbal glorifying the Moorish rule of Spain. The name of the cities Gharnata (Granada) and Qartba (Cordova) represented splendor and grandeur. During the same time Pakistan Television telecasted a serial " Shaheen" based on the novel of Nasim Hijazi. The story was based on the downfall of last Moorish ruler of Spain. The names of Badr bin Mugheera and Rabeea, the hero and heroine of the novel, still resonate my ears.
My first attempt to learn Spanish was during these same school days. I bought a small book Spanish Urdu Bol Chal, sort of a Spanish phrase book with no grammar, not of any use. Time kept passing and I kept building my knowledge about Spain and its history. The life of Abdur Rehman (Ad Dakhil) is one of the great stories of history that tells us how an uprooted prince of Damascus (Umayyad Dynasty) re-established the rule of Umayyad in Spain. I also learnt about Hasham the most pious ruler of Umayyad in Spain. The friendship between Abbasid Caliph Haroon Rasheed and Spanish ruler Charlemagne is also an interesting chapter of Spanish history.
As far as learning language was concern I had little success. In 1999 through Internet I started learning Spanish again. It was an interesting start. I joined Spanish language channels in MIRC (Bolivia, Mexico, Peru, Chile etc). On these channels I used to write hi and the answer I got was hola...so I learnt hola means hello. This was the beginning. Next I got was " de donde eres". I absolutely had no idea what it was. So opened the web site alt vista and used it translation facility by writing the sentence in the window and clicking translate " Spanish to English"...what I got was " from where you are"...so it means de donde eres. I wanted to ask if the chatter is male or female so I wrote m/f?? the answer came m. I thought the chatter was male but in fact it was female because I later discovered mujer is female and hombre is male. So in Spanish it is m/h? to ask for gender. Through these chatting sessions I learnt more words and sentences. Eprendiendo espanol...I am learning Spanish. Muchu Gusto...(Nice to meet you) Igualmente (same here) and blah blah blah. I also made friendship with a girl from Bolivia and I tried to write in Spanish by taking help from alta vista web site. My adventure in learning Spanish was limited on net and no one to speak to me so it didn't go much longer. Now here I know little bit of Spanish but of course I cannot claim that I know Spanish. I haven't given it up. I will one day learn Spanish and read Spanish literature without translation. The books of García Márquez will be among the first ones. Adios.

Orion Belt....my friend in the winter sky

Its night here and everything is quiet, what I can hear is only the sound of my typing keys and this sound is music to my ears because I know each strike on the key brings my ideas on the blog and I love it. I just saw Orion Belt on the vast expanse of western horizon....as the summer is approaching it will disappear and only show itself again when winter comes...it will now be visible in the nights of southern hemisphere. I remember it was 1989 when I started developing interest in astronomy or to be specific in watching different constellations of the sky. During these nights of sky watching I made frienship with Orion Belt. Whenever something important happens in my life I look upward and say "hey Orion you see I have got this, Orion see......I am here in Thar, Orion you look so beautiful in the sky over the arid mountains off super highway ( between Hyderabad and Karachi...I must have travelled thousands times on this route). All my conversations with Orion could only take place during winter nights and when it is not here I wait for it to reappear. Tonight I have seen it on the western horizon ...soon it will be set and...as summer is approaching it will say good bye to the dwellers of northern hemisphere. O Orion!!I will miss you and I wont say come soon...as I know you will come in your time. Have a nice stay in the south. Do tell me about lake titicaca and andes and kangaroos when you reappear. BBye

Ride to unknown

In the evening I took out my bike and picked up Z and said to him, "Let's go." He asked where???...dont ask just come with me..as at that time I had no idea myself where to go..I just wanted to get out to some place where I was away from the mess of the city .....he like always was ready for another ride to unknown......I decided to go straight towards airport road.....(yes, there is an airport in Hyderabad, closed for so long now) and up we went on the rise that is called Ganju Tikkar ( the bald mountain) towards CATI ( Civil Aviation Training Institute) on the left was Sindh Regimental Centre (HQ for Pak Army's Sindh Regiment) the road was narrow but in good condition and the surrounded by arid land. We kept moving straight till we passed Kohsar Housing Scheme and found the splendid scene down there where green lush fields were present and the sun was about to set, just across the fields we could see the glittering water of River Indus. I thought to go down near the fields and watch the sun set. We went down a steep decline towards the fields. There we found a young guy of listening to Sindhi music on the radio. We went to him and he told us his name was Ali Hassan Chuttu. I practiced my Sindhi after long time. I have always felt that I speak better Sindhi whenever I am talking to a peasant than to any one of my Sindhi friends here in the city. It may be because I become conscious or feel being judged..... whatever but at that time it was a smooth talking in Sindhi. He told me about the expanding city that was threatening to gulp his small village. He knew it was inevitable as the lush green field was already purchased by the builders for another housing scheme. I felt bad but he told me that water scarcity was another cause of the selling of lands to builder. Another village would be extinct soon. Sun was about to set. We said good bye to Ali Hassan Chuttu as we watched sunset beyond the green fields.

Its suffocating out there

Dust, smoke........on the roads....rickshaws emitting whirls of poisonous smoke and the dust from the ruined roads mixing with them and I am out there...feeling suffocated...my eyes redening and my heart pounding ..... the invisible pillow of fume smothering me, is there anyone who could take off the pillow......but every one is rushing, rushing in or rushing out?.....I don't know but I have to rush back to my home to breath deeply in the air that gives life.......the downtown is a gas chamber .....where poison is poured into the blood and thoughts of the people ......they fight with each other, they lose temper, its mayhem...its hell..yet they don't know what they need....they need fresh air, flowers, blue sky, shining sun......to get back their smiles, to make them generous and accomodating. Fresh air you envelop me.......I cannot live without you.

Keep the momentum going.

Now when you have over come the inertia and started doing the jobs which were pending for so long do not let procrastination creep in again. Keep finishing the tasks and if negetive thoughts come just do not heed them. Just keep the momentum going.

Saramago's Cave, I got it.

Hey....I got Jose Saramago's The Cave, I am so happy. I didn't go to Karachi I placed the order online and here it is. Now I have done what I said to you I would do. Happy!!!

Let the fun remain !

Don't be too good to me lest I be good to you then all the fun is gone.

Respect for freedom of speach, yes....submission NO

The editor of JP has written lately why he published cartoons. I quote
"Has Jyllands-Posten insulted and disrespected Islam? It certainly didn't intend to. But what does respect mean? When I visit a mosque, I show my respect by taking off my shoes. I follow the customs, just as I do in a church, synagogue or other holy place. But if a believer demands that I, as a nonbeliever, observe his taboos in the public domain, he is not asking for my respect, but for my submission. And that is incompatible with a secular democracy."

Here I reply
" Have muslims insulted and disrespected freedom of speach? They certainly didn't intend to. But what does respect mean? When I read newspapers I show my respect to freedom of speach by showing tolerance towards the criticism of many muslims, governments of Islamic countries and practices within Islamic countries . But if a proponent of freedom of speech demands that I, as a believer of Islamic faith, follow his standards for freedom of speech even if he insults and derogates the very person who embodies Islam then he is not asking for my respect, but for my submission. And that is incompatible with my Islamic faith."

Diary 1994

Quotations and facts........from the diary of 1994

"I am always ready to learn but I do not always like being taught" ( Churchill)

I feel rather low and don't have the energy.
Bang
A
Nasty
Job
Off

Real exile begins when you no longer pine for home, when it has been lost forever, buried in the recesses of the psyche, and the only home you have is memory.
( Susha Guppy from her book A girl in Paris)

Because humor involves ambiguity and newness, and because the mechanical thinker avoids ambiguity, he misses a great deal of the charming absurdity in the world around him. ( Brain Power)

When a custom, belief, value, or practice is defended and worshipped for its own sake instead of for the definite benefits it offers, it has become Crap-with a capital C. ( Brain Power)

Intimacy is often frightening because itinvolves risk. In an intimate relationship people are vulnerable and many times it seems easier to pass time or to play games than to risk feelings either of affection or rejection. Winners risk genuine intimacy.

If there is no wind, row.

No body is 100%.
To a snale a turtle is fast.
Sidewalks don't always go where you want to go.

Italian merchant Fra Luca Pacioli is the Father of modern accounting.

It's not the name that we are called, but the name that we answer to is important.

A nova, blazing out of deep space is remarkable, but, except by astronomers, unremarked.

A person who isn't busy living is busy dying.

The spark of genius travel a non linear path.